If you're interested - February 9th, 2008

You may or may not know that my long time friend and business partner Bryan is a bit of an old git...much older than yours truly who is merely a tad older than a small number of younger folk. 

With his advanced years comes many blessings...winter fuel allowance, flu jabs...that sort of thing..oh and of course.. the Senior Screen. This much coveted adventure constitutes a weekly jaunt to the Odeon cinema together with hordes of similar film-loving wrinklies who get to see newish films of their choice at roughly half  the  rate reserved for normal punters like me. So anyway,  last week...Bryan's good lady was unavoidably detained with chicken poxed grandkids and as tickets had been purchased..I was invited along...what could I say..it was free...and there was a cup of tea and digestives on offer. 

'Don't worry' he promised...'people of all ages go..' in response to my indignation that he should want me to attend some old folk's tea party..and, as I was soon to discover, he was right...all ages between sixty and ninety that is....still, you know what they say..want to look good? Then get an ugly/old/fat  friend...or in my case, a whole theatre full of them..boy did I look hot!

Totally bizarre...there I was trying to blend in as hordes of twin-setted white-tops washed in through the sliding doors making a collective bee-line for the tea urn...I was almost overpowered by the unmistakable aroma of polygrip and White Linen parfum as ladies of a certain age swarmed around eying me somewhat suspiciously as their long suffering husbands trundled along in their wakes.

Indeed, the only thing more bizarre was the MC who introduced the film...clearly a man in love with his job ( and himself)...and overtly adored by the old ladies..a pin could be heard as he tickled their collective fancies with movie trivia about Robert Redford and Tom Cruise amid oohs and aahs from the ladies...I felt like a prisoner... drugged, manacled and forced to partake in some insanely cheerful rest-home soiree... it was blessed relief when he finally buggered off and we got to watch the film ' Lions for Lambs' ...a reasonably decent critique of media reporting of American foreign policy and political machinations in and around the White House..even more of a relief when the credits rolled and I was able to escape from their company...the unmistakable aura of the reaper much too close for comfort for a man recently turned fifty...too much of a reminder of my own mortality
Anyway..tried it once..think I'll wait until I actually qualify for the cheap tickets before I contemplate venturing along to the Senior Screen again..